There is something about terminal diseases or near death health experiences that give you a special view into yourself and how you approach your life. This is true of people who, like me, have carcinoid cancer that will eventually take their lives and it is true of people who have heart attacks, other types of cancer and are either cured or not cured.
These experiences do a funny thing to your attitudes. You start to prioritize things differently. You start to think more about what the long (and short) term consequences are for the decisions you make today. I was always one that was willing to take a day off of work when sufficient snow fell but I also frequently worked like a madman, putting in multiple 80 hour weeks to achieve a deadline.
Work was fun and rewarding but I missed things. I went on a business trip once over my daughter's birthday. Yeah, I know she will have many, many more but I missed one for work and the trip wasn't even that important. I still love many aspects of my job and am blessed with quite a bit of latitude in the projects that I work on and get to work on so many cool things but work is no longer a priority.
20 years from now, no one is going to recall whether or not I worked a particular day. Even when I am at my best, receiving accolades and kudos for my performance at work, no one will remember that 5 years from now. On the other hand, being a coach for my son's or daughter's soccer team will be remembered for all their lives. Taking a day off to play hooky with my son on a bluebird powder day at Copper Mountain? That is something that will make a difference.
This disease has blessed me with the ability to see what is really important and to focus on those things. Work, though highly rewarding and satisfying, is no longer a priority. Family, friends, and memories are what I want. That is where I want to spend my time. Coaching and encouraging my wife through her first metric century was one of my proudest accomplishments of 2013. 21 ski days with my family and friends in the 2013-2014 season was outstanding. Watching my youngest son come within inches of a hat-trick, seeing my daughter excel academically and begin to compete as a swimmer, and watching my oldest son manage the defensive line on his premier team are all things I value now.
Family, friends, and memories. That is what I want for my legacy. That is what I want people to remember about me. That is what will last long after I have become worm food.
You don't need to wait for your near death experience or life changing event to see what is really important. Love those around you and let them know how important they are to you. Show them where they rank by spending your most valuable asset on them: Your time.
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