Surgery tomorrow? Not quite...

It has been a rough two weeks since my last post simply because I am getting worn down from the hits.  I have not been eating anything other than small sips of water in addition to the 2liters of TPN.  My last 'food' was probably the Strawberry Jello snack I had on my birthday, May 17th.  I tried eating one more time after that but my digestive tract had other ideas and the food came back up.

The blockage is certainly becoming more severe.  I have had some stool movement (VERY watery with suspended material) so part of the intestine has been starting to decompress.  Unfortunately, I am not in a position for surgery quite yet.

Dr. Boudreaux felt my abdomen and said it felt very blocked and scarred.  Laying flat is difficult from the tightness and there are places where it is quite painful when he presses.  Definitely obstructed and definitely in need of surgery but he needs me to improve in two ways.

First, he wants to insert an NG tube (I had one of these back in April of 2012 and they are damned uncomfortable to receive when conscious) to try and relieve some of the pressure on the bowel from the top side.  This will make it easier to manipulate and safer for me and the surgery.  Second, he wants to continue the TPN as well as start some additional shots to try end encourage protein usage.

The long and short of this is no surgery tomorrow.  I had been counting on this for weeks now and keeping it in my sights as a day of relief but we are putting it off another week.  I will be hitting the ER tomorrow and then transferred to a room for a week of in patient NG tube and TPN until surgery the follow Wednesday, June 2nd.

There is a funny symmetry to 2012 in that in 2012

• we came down on Memorial day (check)
• had clinic on the day after memorial day (check), 
• surgery on 5/31, 6/1, and 6/2.

I guess it only made sense to delay surgery to 6/2 to maintain the symmetry to 2012...

I am losing it.  I am at my limit and beyond with this last sequence.  Have you noticed how many commercials are about food?  Have you realized how much of social life revolves around food?  I feel somewhat like an outcast with my inability to eat and my hunger cannot be satiated.  I feel run down and tired and am having a hard time just going day to day right now.

At least the NG tube will stop the vomiting.  At least the surgery is coming (although I said that before).  At least I have my beautiful wife at my side.  At least I have made it long enough to see my first born graduate high school.  I just need to get past this mountain I have in front of me.